Exposing Infidelity Intimately

Cheating is commonly enacted as a way to avoid asking tough questions about why we feel dissatisfied in our life—not just dissatisfied in our relationships. That statement doesn’t justify cheating.

Maybe their infidelity isn’t the worst thing that ever happens to you. Maybe discovering their cheating doesn't mean the end of the relationship. Maybe finding out they were hiding a part of their life doesn’t mean every loving moment shared was false and fake.

Maybe infidelity doesn’t make someone a terrible human.

Maybe you could view infidelity as a symptom or sign that something inside the relational dynamic is missing. That doesn’t mean you are missing something. Read that again. Their infidelity doesn’t mean you are lacking anything.

Their infidelity isn’t about you.

Their infidelity is about them, and something is missing in their life. The lack in their life, and their inability to communicate, feeling a lack, is how the heartbreaking impact of infidelity bleeds into your life and leads you to believe that it is about you.

But you are not the wound that leads them to cheat. Read that again. Infidelity isn’t about you.

Maybe they are missing a sense of passion since changing careers. Maybe they are missing a sense of adventure after they injured themselves. Maybe they are missing emotional closeness since their best friend moved away. They are missing something… something that has nothing to do with you and your relationship with them.

Serial cheaters are statistically not that common, but cheating is common.