Your Body Has a Rythm
Our nervous system is designed to move through cycles of expansion and contraction. This rhythm is as natural as the seasons, as the ocean tides, as the cycle of breath in and breath out. Yet in our fast-paced, hyper-productive culture, we’re often encouraged to stay in a state of constant expansion—constantly pushing, achieving, and being “on.” We’re praised for our productivity, for our ability to keep going, to stay “up” even when we’re running on empty. But the truth is, without periods of contraction—times of rest, retreat, and introspection—our nervous system cannot sustain this rhythm. We need both phases to maintain balance, resilience, and well-being.
In interpersonal neurobiology, these cycles of expansion and contraction are seen as fundamental to the health of our nervous system. Expansion is when we’re in a state of engagement and openness—connecting with others, exploring, expressing ourselves. It’s the part of the cycle where we feel energized and outwardly focused. Contraction, on the other hand, is a time for withdrawal, for turning inward, for processing and integrating what we’ve experienced. This phase might feel quieter, slower, and more introspective, but it’s no less essential. In contraction, our body restores and recalibrates, creating the space we need to expand once more.
When we honor this natural rhythm, we allow ourselves to live in alignment with our body’s needs. But when we ignore the need for contraction, we risk burning out, becoming overwhelmed, or feeling disconnected from ourselves. A nervous system that’s in perpetual expansion becomes overstimulated, hyper-aroused, and unable to truly relax. We may find it harder to sleep, to feel grounded, to process emotions. Over time, this imbalance can lead to chronic stress, anxiety, or even physical health issues.
Somatic therapists understand that honoring these cycles is about more than just “taking breaks.” It’s about listening to the body’s cues, tuning into moments when we feel the pull to slow down, to breathe, to step back. Contraction is a time to replenish our reserves, to let our bodies integrate the experiences we’ve had, and to reconnect with ourselves in a way that’s grounded and whole. This ebb and flow is a core part of the healing process, allowing us to build resilience, restore energy, and approach life from a place of balance rather than exhaustion.
In the context of trauma healing, these cycles take on an even deeper significance. Trauma often disrupts our nervous system’s natural rhythm, leaving us stuck in one part of the cycle. Some people remain in a state of contraction—feeling numb, withdrawn, or disconnected—while others may feel trapped in perpetual expansion, hyper-vigilant and unable to rest. Healing, then, is about gently inviting the nervous system back into balance, helping it move fluidly between expansion and contraction once more. This rhythm is the essence of regulation, the foundation of feeling safe, resilient, and connected.
Learning to trust this rhythm within ourselves is an act of self-compassion. Instead of viewing contraction as “lazy” or “unproductive,” we can begin to see it as an essential part of growth. Just as a plant must rest in winter before it blooms in spring, we, too, must allow ourselves moments of stillness if we want to thrive. Expansion and contraction are not opposites; they are partners in a cycle that sustains our well-being.
So, the next time you feel the need to pull back, to pause, to turn inward—listen to it. This isn’t a sign of weakness; it’s a sign that your body is seeking balance, preparing itself to expand fully again. By honoring these cycles, you’re giving your nervous system exactly what it needs to support you in the long run: the space to contract, to heal, to restore, and ultimately, to thrive in a life that’s both expansive and grounded.